Many, many tears

I haven't written in a long time. I can't seem to make the words come, to release some of this pain that is so deep inside. 

I am watching Tony crumble before my eyes. His face is a constant mask of pain, tears flow like rain from his eyes. The naked pain is so excruciating to see on my husband's face. My heart constantly aches for him. 

There seems to be nothing I can do to comfort him. He is spiraling downwards, only Jennifer can reach him now.

I pray each night for her to go to him, to help him. I beg God to please help him, to not continue to let him live in this constant torment. I don't know what else to do.

I am very frightened that this is going to destroy him.