As I watch my husband sinking deeper and deeper into this unrelenting sea of pain and despair, I see a broken man. A man whose body will not be able to withstand this continuous crushing grief. I see a man who has changed, changed so much since the death of our daughter, Jennifer.
I freely admit, to him, that I have been praying everyday and every night, for God to release him from this agonizing pain that he is constantly consumed by. I don't believe that God would want him to continue to suffer like this. I know God loves him, just as he loves everyone else here on this earth. I know that God is suffering along with my husband. He sees what is in his heart...that Tony is a good man.
I pray for Tony to receive what he has been looking for. I pray for God's love for my husband, and for Him to please put an end to his endless suffering. I pray for God to hear our cries, and give Tony what he needs so desperately. I know that God will give us all that we need, as that is His promise to us, His children.
We both knelt by our bedside last night and pleaded for God's help.
I am afraid that Tony will not be able to go on much longer in the state he is in. So I ask anyone reading this post, to please add your prayers to ours, that God intervened for Tony. To release him from this, to help Jennifer connect to Tony, and to let him receive what he desperately needs from her. Or for God to release Tony from this earth, and allow him to come home to God. Allow him to be with Jennifer.
I would rather lose him to God than to continue to watch him deteriorate the way that he is. I would gladly give him up to God.
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